Rooster's Revenge

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Given a choice between sitting through an unorganized technical presentation with awful PowerPoint slides and torture by waterboarding, I will take waterboarding.

Why? Because I know waterboarding lasts 40 seconds not 40 minutes. Plus, the psychological damage with waterboarding is only temporary. Shitty slide presentations are burned into my brain forever.

I especially like the ones where the pitch is “our software works magic in 5 minutes”. I am from Missouri. Show me.

If it really takes 5 minutes, then do a live demo.

No excuses. If you can’t do a live demo due to no internet, then do a Camtasia screen capture of it in action.

Seems simple to me.

Hell. When I used to this, I would ask the prospect to time me. If I said 5 minutes, I would usually finish in 4.

Under promise and over deliver. Hell. I would settle for just deliver.

Do it one better. Get one of your paying customers to come in and do the demo. What better testimonial is there than that? Walk in with one customer and leave with two.

When it comes to software for the die guy, most software companies have good intentions, but get it wrong.

The software could be solid modeling, estimating, formability analysis, or even online ecommerce.

My top five for what matters is:

1. Ease of use.
2. Accurate results.
3. Live and local technical support.
4. Reliable performance.
5. Useful and necessary features.

My top five for what does NOT matter is:

1. Detailed explanations of how the code works that only a PhD would understand.
2. Focus on aspects that are not relevant, like transverse shear stress calculations.
3. Fancy and expensive marketing materials that drive up the cost of software.
4. Industry awards like “business of the month”. Who cares?
5. Pot shots at competitor software products.

Software companies need to make an effort to understand what matters to the die guy. And deliver.